Suicide Counseling:
Suicide is not a neutral word. Suicide is not a neutral behavior. As a word, it evokes powerful emotional reactions regardless of the outcome. Fear, anxiety, disbelief and anger are but a few of the emotions that create an atmosphere which impedes involvement in the issues of suicide. As a consequence, attitudes and actions of avoidance and indifference occur. However, with adequate information and the creation of realistic expectations, this avoidance and indifference may be alleviated and replaced with positive actions and reactions.
Suicide is a traumatic event for the individual and for all of those people who have some connection with that person.
Suicide is a highly individualized behavior in reaction to multiple life stressors and interactions that have produced negative or perceived negative outcome.
The following is written to provide a framework of information and some methods of intervention. It is written in the hope that all members of the university will engage in the creation of a caring and confrontative community with some alternatives.
Why Do People Consider Suicide
Because each individual is unique, there is no single reason why someone has suicidal thoughts or may attempt to kill themselves. Factors that may contribute to having suicidal thoughts are:
- A major life transition that is very upsetting or disappointing
- A loss of an important relationship or the death of a loved one
- Depression, anxiety or other serious emotional troubles
- Feelings of hopelessness or despair
- Low self-esteem or shame
- Failure to live up to one’s own or others’ expectations
- Extreme loneliness
- News of a major medical illness
- Severe physical or emotional pain
- Alcohol or drug problems
Warning Signs
There are many verbal and nonverbal warning signs that someone may be suicidal and crying out for help. These warning signs include:
- Extended depression, sadness or uncontrolled crying
- Giving away personal or prized possessions
- Lack of interest in previously enjoyed activities
- Lack of interest in personal appearance
- Withdrawal from friends
- Lack of energy or ambition
- Changes in sleeping or eating habits
- Increased use of drugs or alcohol
- Restlessness or hyperactivity
- Increased risky behaviors
- Hopelessness and helplessness
- Remarks or social media posts like: “It’ll be over soon,” “I can’t take it anymore,” “I have no reason to go on,” “My life will never get better,” or “People will be better off without me.”
- Previous suicide attempts
- A recent loss or trauma from which a person is not recovering
Ways to Help
- Start. Find a quiet, comfortable place to talk. Don’t promise to keep your discussions secret or confidential.
- Connect. Pay attention and avoid distractions.
- Ask: Use phrases that show you want to help, such as “It seems like you’re having a hard time. I’d like to hear about it,” or “I wanted to check in because you haven’t seemed yourself lately.”
- Listen. Take in what the person says to make sure you understand fully. Ask questions, such as “When did you begin feeling like this,” and “How can I best support you right now?” Don’t say “I know how you feel,” because you aren’t that person or experiencing their feelings.
- Offer hope. Let the person know you care and that help is available. Before ending the conversation, have a next step you both agree on, like planning another time to talk or connecting with professional help.
- Encourage the person to seek help: You may want to offer to accompany them to talk to a faculty or staff member, a mental health clinician, or Walk-in Clinic.
- Help someone to stay safe: If someone is in danger, stay with them and call for help such as local police.
- Talk with a clinician or someone else You trust: This way, you can share the responsibility with others, attend to your own need for support, and receive guidance about how you can continue to be of help.